Taking ChancesTime and again I have avoided small chances for fear of failure. Thinking back to school dances, I would avoid asking a girl to dance for fear I would be rejected. And most of the time you wouldn't find me at a dance anyway because I didn't even want to face the possibility that I might want to ask a girl to dance. Besides, I was never much of a dancer--guess I didn't want to take the chance to learn to be at least passable at dancing.
It's been the little things like that in my life that I have avoided because there seemed to be a risk of some kind involved. Yet when it came to some of my biggest decisions like taking out on the road with a touring show or relocating two thousand miles to live in Los Angeles, I made my decision without much consideration of things like failure or disappointment. I just did it because it seemed like something I wanted to do.
Maybe I've fretted too much about the small choices--the things with mostly temporal effects and outcomes. Perhaps it's part of being a dreamer with big dreams. The minor dreams seemed to get in the way of where I wanted to go without any consideration on my behalf that those little dreams are just diversions along life's journey.
These days I'm not overly concerned about taking chances because there aren't that many I have to face. Other than the risks of getting out of bed in the morning or driving to the store or the daily stuff of life, most potential risks are things I might fantasize about while never having to face the reality of those thoughts.
Maybe it's time for taking real chances. I could try to turn dreams to reality and failure be damned. I'm getting too old to worry about failure. All of my years of living so far should count toward something. Surely I've learned a few things.
Do you wanna dance? Might as well get out on the floor and take a chance.
Are you a risk taker? What is your biggest deterrent to taking chances?--Fear of failure? Success? Facing ridicule?
I don't fear to being ridicule, and sometimes it would be better for me to just avoid to do silly things... ;)
ReplyDeleteFrederique, I know I've done my sure of silly and not-so-good things. I keep trying to be better.
DeleteLee
Lee,
ReplyDeleteI don't consider myself a 'risk taker'. I like to considering options before taking a chance and then deciding is the risk worth it if I can say yes comfortably then I take the risk. The small things in life as you pointed out which should be the easiest and safest risks we don't act on because of we're afraid of failure. You're not alone. I think back on my decisions in college I went what I thought was a safe course of study when I wanted to be an architect. I decided against it because I was afraid I couldn't do it. How did I know that I couldn't? I didn't even try! Maybe I couldn't. Being an architect requires a lot of math, I think, and I'm definitely number challenged. The basics is about it for me. Then there was art...sounded like a fun field of study but could I make a living at it? I certainly lacked confidence and in those early years I really felt like artsy ability wasn't exciting. I know now my low self-esteem held me back from pushing the boundaries of what I could do. Truly sad what we don't see in ourselves when we're young. I can't change the past but I can push myself now to take a few more risks with the small things. The world won't come to an end for me if I fail and I can just swipe it aside as a learning experience before moving forward. It sounds like I'm ready to dance, too. :) Happy A2Zing!
Cathy's Pinup Girl Art Sketch Series 'T'
Cathy, I figure we get to a certain age where we can try conceivably crazy things and it might seem kind of in character in some way.
DeleteLee
Wonderful post Lee. sorry for not being around not too well. I am not a risk taker,,,, perhaps I ought to try it someday. Take care.
ReplyDeleteYvonne.
Yvonne, I'm doing terrible at keeping up this year. Pent up in my house I ready to take risks just to get out.
DeleteLee
I'm not a risk-taker either. I carefully consider everything first. Now I'm to a point in life where there aren't many big risks I'd need to take.
ReplyDeleteAlex, I probably don't need to take many risks but I might like to take certain ones.
DeleteLee
I feel like I’m a huge risk taker but I let people talk me out of the things I want to take a risk doing. I let their fears and their reasoning get in the way of me taking the risk in the first place. If I would have stopped listening I would be much farther in my career now. I waited and now I’m playing catch up. Better late than never!
ReplyDeleteAda Z, I think you've turned things out pretty well for yourself. Just having your family is such a blessing. And as you say, it's better late than never. You are resilient.
DeleteDad
Thanks Arlee for your personal insight on chances, risks and dreams. Personally I tend to just go for it, without thinking too much. It has never gotten me into real trouble so I must have a little person , called instinct, inside me that keeps me safe without hindering my dreams with intempestives warnings .... take care and live your dreams, you never know what tomorrow will be made of.
ReplyDeleteSusan B, instinct is a wise way to go if you want to really live a live and not fear living.
DeleteLee
I'm more a creature of habit these days, but I wasn't always. Glad I survived ;-)
ReplyDeleteFollow your heart, my friend. It always leads you home.
Diedre, Amen to that! We are on a similar wavelength in this aspect of life.
DeleteLee
A calculated risk taker, perhaps? I do like to stir it up at times. I'd say I do it by intuition, but often, there's no rhyme or reason!
ReplyDeleteEli, living a bit on the edge sounds good to me in certain cases. No rhyme nor reason probably kind of sums it up for many of us.
DeleteLee
I also tended to avoid the smaller risks while doing life changing things without a lot of worry. Never thought about it that way before.
ReplyDeleteKristin, it might be that most of us do things this way. Maybe it has something to do with our expectations and our irrational approach to decision making.
DeleteLee
Total 'risk-taker' here! I don't think you can be a published writer without an element of risk taking. - Dragons & Spaceships
ReplyDeleteD&S, And that applies to any career pursuit. But when we are really putting ourselves out there and on the line than the risks can be immense.
DeleteLee
Taking risks and me don't mix, even as a young girl I didn't take risks
ReplyDeleteJo-Anne's, you've probably taken a lot more risks than you think.
DeleteLee
That first paragraph had me written all over it. And I would have failed, because I never understood what being a giver and not a taker was.
ReplyDeleteCW, those teen years could be so filled with angst and fear of not being accepted by peers.
DeleteLee