Just Thinking As We Approach Year's End (déjà vu)

This is a re-post from my currently inactive memoir blog Wrote By Rote.  This post first appeared on December 31, 2011.   





Winds of Change Without Awareness--A New Year's Eve Once Upon a Time

                                                             Image via Wikipedia

I try to remember but I can't. It's the exact year that I don't remember, or most of the details of that evening. I do know it was New Year's Eve.

I was married to my second wife, Susan, at the time. We were in Tennessee at my parents' house. This is where we typically spent New Year's Eve. It was the more happening place between going to Richmond, Virginia, where her parents lived, and being with my family, who were the more fun party people.

My father was still alive at the time, our kids were still babies, and my wife and I were still in our thirties. The house was aglow with lights and music and chatter and laughter as the festivities pressed on toward the turning over of one year to the next. Everyone was having a grand time.

At one point Susan and I decided to go out into the dark quiet of the night to take a break from the activity in the house. It was unseasonably warm that end of December night. Strangely and unseasonably warm--more like a summer night, but with the crisp dryness of autumn.

In silence, we strolled into the expansive back yard to a point that was about fifty yards from the house and sat down side by side in the desiccated winter grass. Wordless, we smoked a joint under a cloudless starry sky and basked in the comforting balminess of the evening breeze. Gazing upon the big house with lights in every window silhouetted against the black night sky, I slipped into a meditation.

Here from where we sat in the back yard, the lights, the house, the people seemed so far away, and it was only Susan and I with our life together beautiful and filled with so much promise. A feeling of serenity and security enveloped me as I clutched Susan's hand. I felt that now was forever and this moment would have no end.

Then a whoosh of warm wind swept over us and I felt exhilarated. With a deep breath I leaned forward to breathe in the moment. It was only Susan and I. Our world was perfect. A mental image of a distant future filled my mind--a place peaceful and beautiful where my wife and I would grow older together and watch our grandchildren grow and we would fade into the twilight years happy with the satisfaction of dreams fulfilled.

That was then, one moment on a New Year's Eve many years ago. Not too many years after that night it ended. Things changed and became different. I'm not even sure what happened or why it happened, but only that it did happen. Susan left and what we had was over. Any dreams she had once had about us were simply shrugged off as she moved on, leaving me to shoulder the burdens of memory and the confusion of questioning why things had come to the point they had reached.

It was one New Year's Eve when things were weirdly warm and sublimely wonderful. It was only an illusion--my personal illusion I guess. The winds bring change that we don't even realize, things we don't understand even after they've blown past us. Life sweeps us forward to where the next adventure awaits. There is time for memories, but no real time for memories. The memories are only illusion.

A new year is a new year and an old year is an old year and all of the years just blend together. Our minds capture certain memories isolated without reference other than the years that came before and the years that followed, whichever those years might have been. And even then we sometimes don't know which years or why.

Capture this moment in time. Savor it and breathe it in deeply. This is the last time you will ever be here.

            Have you ever been swept by a magical wind?   When your expectations aren't fulfilled do you accept your circumstances with a shrug or clenched fists?   How much has your life changed in the past seven years?

Two Writers Walk into a Bar...

     

        "Two writers walk into a bar" sounds like a variation on a cliched joke opening.  And really the observation has little to do with the point I wanted to make in this post.  First though, if you haven't voted on my current Battle of the Bands you might want to click this link in order to vote and read  the story and then skim through the comments   My words today are reflective of what was said there.

          Also, you might want to check out my most recent post on Wrote By Rote for some more backstory regarding the Battle of the Bands post.  In my Battle winner's announcement on Wednesday I'll continue on with my reflections and then hope to hear your thoughts as well.  Come to that post with your philosopher's robe and your memory cap.

            Concerning present thoughts about the two writers walking into a bar--I'll state right here that in my life I have been no stranger to going to bars, but for the most part I have neither been a frequent bar patron.  Not like Stephen T. McCarthy seemed to indicate about himself in his comment on my post.   Here's part of what McCarthy said:

It's occurred to me lately that probably there is no place you can go and meet a wider spectrum of people -- good and bad -- than in a bar. And I don't mean any bar. Not some rundown ghetto bar. But your average bar and grill in an average neighborhood.

That does pretty much describe people I've found in bars.  I have these vague recollections of some pretty interesting people that I've met and spent an hour or two or more with and then I never see them again and can't even remember their names.  

         However,  me being in a bar by myself is unlikely.  Most of my visits to bars were because I was with other people who were going there.  I'd go, but I usually didn't drink much.   For one thing I'm cheap--or should I say frugal?--and don't like spending money drinking.  Happy hour can be nice--especially if there are cheap (or even free!) snacks to nosh on while sipping inexpensive drinks. Then I save money on dinner and that ain't bad at all.

          My bar days are essentially behind me though so if two writers walk into a bar then one of them would probably not be me.   So the question in order to arrive at the punch line is who are these writers?  What are their genres?   Or for that matter, do they write fiction?

           As a joke teller you'd want to establish character motivation and set the scene.   Maybe some backstory would be good.  Are the writers married?   What are their genders?  What are their educational backgrounds?   And who else is in the bar?

         Sorry but I could keep rambling on about this idea. Maybe there is no joke here from my telling.  I should write a story about this.  I was never very good at telling jokes.    Actually maybe I should write a book about it.  Be watching for the release of my forthcoming book Two Writers Walk into a Bar.   Yeah, right, sure--just as soon as I write it.

           Hmmm...I kind of like that title:  Two Writers Walk into a Bar.

            Are you good at telling jokes?   Have you (or do you still) ever hung out in bars?  What would be a good way to end the joke that starts "Two writers walk into a bar..."?

Juggling Museum & BOTB Results

The Juggling Jacksons promo shot 1966--That's Arlee
standing behind Dad.

The Juggling Jacksons

        Some of you might have seen my post at Wrote By Rote (my memoir blog) concerning my family's donation to the Historical Juggling Props Museum.   If you missed it you can see our contributions here and here.  The web site for the Museum is fun to peruse especially if you're not close enough to visit the actual museum display in person.

         So far there isn't much video available on YouTube of anything Juggling Jacksons related, but below is a brief video of my sister Joy and I a few years ago goofing off in her kitchen with an enthusiastic audience cheering us on.  Hopefully one day I'll get some other video transferred and up on YouTube.





Battle of the Bands Results
(for 12/15/2015)

       

      If you missed the Battle that goes with these results you can visit here, but the vote has been decided. I wasn't overly surprised by the outcome of this Battle considering how my previous Battle turned out. The readers who vote on my BOTB posts tend to be traditionalists where it comes to music so techno or more extreme forms of rock or other genres usually don't go over that well. It's gone that way in this contest as well.

     The version of "Trouble of the World" as performed by Rose Stone and the Abbot Kinney Lighthouse Choir is a rousing rendition that I can't resist liking. This interpretation of the song reflects a joyousness that one might expect on leaving this world into the security of God's heavenly realm. Right from the opening electric guitar riff to the vocal interplay, this song is filled with so much energy. My favorite part of this recording is the steady solid drumbeat. My head gets to bobbin', my toes a-tappin', and I just want to get up on my feets and praise the lord all over the house. This is musical dynamite.

     On the other hand, Mahom is tough for many listeners to get into. For my part I didn't even finish listening during my first sampling of the song. I quickly decided to use another version and believe me, I found many great versions. However, I returned to the Mahom version to give it a fair chance. Noting the points of comparison and contrast between the Rose Stone version I began to see an interesting Battle in the works.

     No one listened to these versions side by side as many times as I did--and I listened to them repeatedly. My opinion of Mahom began changing as I listened more. The performance version from The Ladykillers is no doubt outstanding, but in the end the version I keep hearing in my head now--the one that sticks with me most--is the version by Mahom. Sure it's computer driven music, but I find the sound to be innovative as well as clever. The vocals are very pleasant to my ears. Taking all things into account my favorite version is now Mahom though I certainly cannot dispute anyone's vote for Rose Stone.

     Two great renditions, but my vote goes to Mahom.

Final Vote Talley

Rose Stone    26 votes

Mahom           8 votes

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         Have a Very Merry Christmas and be sure to join me here for my next Battle which will open on New Year's Day with a very appropriate song for the season.
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Does Cutting Back on Blog Posting for Summer Hurt? (#!WSG)

Insecure Writer's Support Group

      It's the first Wednesday of the month which as most of you know means it's time again for another edition of the Insecure Writer's Support Group, the monthly event hosted by Alex J. Cavanaugh.   This is the time when writers from all over the globe discuss writing and all of the conflicting good and bad feelings that come with the pursuit of the literary arts.  This is a forum for commiseration and encouragement.  Maybe things aren't going quite like you'd like or maybe you're a bit nervous about what the future holds.   You might even be riding the high horse of success and feel like you're winning the race.   Whatever your circumstance join us and tell us what you're thinking.

Summertime Blogging Schedule

      Most of us would probably acknowledge that our blog traffic tends to drop some during the summer months.  In fact, a good many of you might even cut back during the summer months or even go so far as to put your blog on hiatus until about September or so.  I've seen this and it does make sense in a lot of ways.

         Every year I tend to do some traveling which interferes to some extent with my blogging activities.  I've tried experiments such as focusing on using guest posts to minimize my own energies on blogging.   Last year I cut back on posting days and tried to keep my posts shorter.   That approach worked well for me and when something works it's probably not a bad idea to stick with it.

         So for the summer of 2015 it's gonna be less posts and posts that might be a bit shorter than normal.   My schedule plan will be to essentially post Mondays only.  However there will be a few times when this will vary.  Since I will still be participating with Battle of the Bands posts on the 1st and 15th of each month and also the #IWSG posts on the first Wednesdays of the month there will be a couple of Wednesday posts in July and two Saturday posts in August that might essentially replace my normal Monday posts.   I might throw in a couple odd posts now and then, but for the most part my schedule will be as I've described.

          There will be summer cutbacks on my other blogs as well.  On my spiritually themed blog A Few Words there has already been the post Temporary Hiatus announcing my summer plans.  Since this is like my mission blog in a sense, I almost feel like I should keep that one going over the others, but averaging less than 50 visitors per post and typically receiving only a couple comments at the most, I feel like taking a break on that site won't be a drastic loss to the blogging world.  

           Tomorrow an announcement post will appear on my dream blog A Faraway View telling readers about my intentions for the summer vacation season.  That blog too has a small number of visitors per post, but it does have a loyal readership who regularly leave comments on every post.  Last year I posted dream song videos which didn't do too badly, but still it took time to compile that.  This year I'm going to save the time and not post on that blog at all until September.

           My memoir blog Wrote By Rote will continue to post each Saturday as long as I don't run into complications doing so.  That blog does have a more solid reader base and I'll do as I did last year and tie in my summer travels with the topics I will be sharing on that blog.  I also often tie in my Battle of the Bands contests with posts on Wrote By Rote.   

           Now, some of you might point back to my A to Z Challenge Elements of Blogging post "UpDate!".   I stirred a bit of controversy by chastising "slacker bloggers" who didn't maintain their blogs regularly.  Take note though that I am following my own guidelines about announcing my intentions ahead of time and I will still be posting regularly unless some circumstance prevents me from doing so.  

         Of course, here is where the insecurities develop.   It might be argued that less posting might lose some of my existing audience.  I think anyone else who has cut back on posting days can vouch that all it does is give them more time for other things and give each of their posts more time for other bloggers to visit and leave comments.  I think Alex J Cavanaugh might agree with this point.

         A complete break like I'm doing on my lesser visited blogs might cause me to lose some of my audience so that I have to go back to build them up, but considering the few that could be lost I don't guess that's much building to worry about.  I've got minor insecurities about these blogs but I always do throughout the year.

        The biggest problem with the summer schedule is that I have less time and opportunity to make the visiting rounds that are required to keep visitors coming to my blog.   I have my regulars who I can usually count on--I thank all of you--but there are always those who need to be reminded to visit me by my visit to them.   If I use the past summers as an indicator, I know my comments will drop which is something that would happen whether I was keeping a summer schedule or not.  The fact is that a lot of people are busy doing non-blogging activities like I'll be doing.  If I don't visit your posts as much during the summer, I hope you will understand my situation.

       Really it's not a big issue--just a little nagging insecurity.  It's the old out of sight out of mind conundrum of marketing and maintaining a public image.  But it's only a blog.  But it's my blog and I've worked hard to keep it active and to have a relatively high profile.  It's my baby and I worry about my babies.   

        I may be slowing down for the summer, but I will be here.  I hope you'll be here with me.

        Do you see your summer blog traffic slow down in summer?   Do your blogging activities tend to slow down during summer?    What will you be doing this summer?

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Arlee's A to Z Summer Road Trip

        I wonder if I might be able to meet up with some of you during my travels this summer.  I'm going to be all over the country and bound to have some time on my hands.   If we could set up some summer meetings that might be fun.  If you're interested, be sure to visit Wrote By Rote in my post upcoming Saturday June 6th and I'll give you some more details.    

Don't forget to vote on my current Battle of the Bands 

If you have not voted yet then visit Battle of the Bands and cast your vote.   I'll be adding votes up tomorrow Thursday June 4th to announce the winner on Friday June 5th.

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Prelude to a Postlude

       A few months back while exploring my vinyl collection I rediscovered an album by an obscure group named Thorinshield.  It's an album I used to enjoy listening to but then forgot until my rediscovery.  One song in particular has been haunting me.  I used it as part of my April A to Z series on my memoir blog Wrote By Rote.  I include it here:




          Coming Friday August 1st!!

         I think "Prelude to a Postlude" is a lovely song, but my song pick for the next Battle of the Bands post is one that I think is absolutely beautiful--or perhaps the word is heavenly.   The song fits in the category of jazz, but I don't necessarily think of it as a particularly jazzy tune.  Be here on Friday to take a listen and vote on your favorite of the two versions I have to offer in this next contest.

          What songs have you rediscovered years after first having heard them?   Do you enjoy melancholy songs?   I haven't offered many clues on my upcoming song picks, but would you want to venture a guess based on the information I've given?

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A to Z Reflections 2014 #atozchallenge

The 2014 Challenge

           The A to Z has its detractors and there are some this year who felt that the Challenge does not add anything to their following, viewers, or commenters.   There are a number of factors to be taken into consideration and I think it's important to examine them before coming to a negative conclusion about the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge.

           On the whole I have read more raves than boo-hoos about A to Z.  I know that most of you continue to be excited.  There are always those who enter the Challenge with high expectations and leave feeling let down.  I will continue to contend that you get out of the Challenge as much as you put into it.  I urge anyone who feels otherwise to take a deep honest look at your own effort and the benefits reaped.

The Community

         On the whole the acquisition of new followers may partly be due to the nature of the community each blogger has developed for themselves.  April  becomes a busy month of moving about and visiting new bloggers.  Not all of these bloggers understand blogging like you or I might understand it.  Some are in it for themselves and Challenge or not this would be the way they would operate anyway.  I'm not sure what else can be done to educate the self-centered bloggers because most likely they are not listening--not even if you say it in a comment on their blogs.

           We are each responsible for cultivating our own communities that revolve around each of our blogs.  If you are not getting followers and comments then you need to examine your blog content and the way you interact with other bloggers.   Just because there's a big list of bloggers signed up to an event like A to Z doesn't necessarily mean you will be guaranteed more visits.  You just have a much larger pool of potentially like minded bloggers to tap into.

           There is a fault with the way the list is done, but I've discussed this in Reflections posts and Analysis posts in previous years.  I won't go into it again, but you might be interested in going back through previous May posts to see what I think.  My thoughts remain essentially the same.

             Generally speaking I think the A to Z blogging community is a fantastic bunch of people with a wide diversity in blogging styles and interests.  The Blogging from A to Z April Challenge remains a vital event with ever-increasing potential.

            If you have any negative thoughts about the Challenge I would encourage you to examine those with intensity and understand why you see it the way you do.  I'm inclined to believe the problem is not so much the Challenge itself, but something you may not be doing correctly or a misguided perception about the Challenge.  But let's talk about it.  You can opt for the comment section on this post or open a dialog on the A to Z Blog or with any of the co-hosts.   We want to continually improve on this event.

Tossing It Out and My Blogs

           During the A to Z Challenge I gained about 60 new followers at Tossing It Out.  This is actually not bad at all in my estimation.  If you are still not following this blog please click that "Join This Blog" button at the top of my sidebar.   My blog views and comments were fairly consistent with the typical performance of this blog though perhaps down over all.  I'll take the blame for that because of my own decrease of activity in networking.   Though if I look at my blog's performance according to weekly stats rather than per post then the numbers are up considerably.

            I'm pleased with my April content on Tossing It Out.   The theme was Marketing and Promotion from A to Z.   My approach was general information with more intent to inspire and encourage than to provide specific details on how to do things.   The posts were fairly pithy and casually delivered.   The response I received was favorable.   I feel good about this year's content on Tossing It Out for the A to Z Challenge.

           Not to confuse anyone about the blog you are now reading, I still consider Tossing It Out to be my main blog and will continue to use this blog as the centerpiece of my blogging efforts.  However, during this year's Challenge I was trying to generate more attention to my other blogs.  These efforts might account for some of the lack of performance at Tossing It Out, but my efforts didn't especially provide much boost to my other blogs either.  Here's where I might share some frustration that others of you might have had concerning your results in regard to numbers and stats.

My Other Blogs

          You might have already or will eventually run across the Reflections posts I did for these blogs, but I will still mention them here since I was trying to push these during this year's Challenge.

            A Few Words may be the kind of blog that many of you prefer to avoid, but I like to think that occasionally I present some topics that might make readers think.   Be forewarned that this is my Bible study blog.  I hope this doesn't stop anyone from reading it, but I think it's only fair to tell you the nature of the content before you go there.  This blog typically publishes on Sundays.

            A Faraway View is what I call my dream blog since it is about the sleep activity of dreaming.  My A to Z theme was movies about dreaming or that seem dreamlike.  I hope film fans might go back to those posts and check out my film recommendations and let me know your thoughts.  This blog normally appears only on Thursdays.

             Wrote By Rote is the blog that I was promoting the most.   This is my Saturday memoir blog that includes sketches about my own life and articles about the writing of memoir.   I encourage guest posts on this blog.   Of all the content presented on all of my blogs during April, this is the blog where I wrote most from my heart.  I think this was my best effort during the Challenge.   I hope I get a few more visitors to those posts.

              Here are some endorsements from some of my Wrote By Rote readers:

Well you've made it to 'Z'. I still can't believe that more folks have not found their way to this marvelous blog. It has become your main blog in my mind. A place where you express so much more than the mundane things every third blogger is also chatting about. I sincerely hope you keep up the great writing here and possibly consider moving more of your efforts to this site, where you really shine.    Faraway Eyes at Faraway Series


I'm kind of in FAE's camp now...I think I prefer this blog to 'Tossing It Out'.
Stephen T McCarthy at Ferret-Faced Fascist Friends

Wrote by Rote is a blog I enjoyed every time I visited, and I think it's not just because you've led a varied and interesting life, but that you know how to describe it so vividly that we can picture ourselves there, beside you.   Lynda Dietz at Easy Reader

  

Please don't stop reading Tossing It Out, but I hope you check out Wrote By Rote and at click the "Join This Site" button.

           Did you do a Reflections post?    Do you have any positives or negatives you want to mention in my comment section?    Have you checked out any of my other blogs?

Join Us with your own Challenge Reflections.  Add ONLY the link directly to your Reflections post:

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Hijack This Blog! Update

Hijack (2008 film) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

         My Hijack This Blog! campaign has been taking shape rather nicely.   Below I have the schedule that has been confirmed to date.   The blank dates are still open for anyone who is interested.  I have a number of pending considerations that will rapidly fill the remaining dates once confirmation has been made on those.

         I already have several of the posts set up and ready to go.  There is some good stuff coming that will inform you, entertain you, and make you think.  Please be sure to check my site every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday to show your support for these bloggers who are contributing such excellent content.  And don't forget to comment.  I guarantee you that a few of these posts will compel you to comment so if you've got something you want to say, be sure to express yourself.  My guests want your input just as much as I do.

Here is the schedule as it stands now:

June    25     Tamara Hart Heiner
           27     Steve Bailey
           29     Linda Hoye
July       2     Nicole Ayers  
             4   #IWSG
             6    Edward Hall
             9   Sharon Hamilton
           11   Andrew Leon
           13   Michael Pierce
           16   Callie Leuck
           18   Lauren Shearer
           20   Jericha Senyak
           23   Clare Dugmore
           25   Bridget Straub
           27   James Callan
           30   Anna Smith
August  1   #IWSG
             3    Jarm Del Boccio
             6      Ey Wade
            8      Stephen T. McCarthy
            10    Diane Kratz
            13   Sydney Aaliyah
            15   Brian Russell
            17  Angeline Trevena
            20
            22    Ciara Knight
            24    Mike Cushing
            27   C. Lee McKenzie
            29   Sandra Ulbrich Almazan
             31     Lubaina
Sept.    3     Eve Prokop
            5        #IWSG
            7     Gwynneth White

         If there is enough interest I will expand the calendar into and beyond September.  In fact, I already have one guest lined up for November.  So don't be shy or afraid.  Be a part of my experiment and help yourself while you help me.

         To sign up click on the "Hijack" tab above or click Here.

More Guest Post Opportunities Await

          Let me also remind you that I am also accepting guest posts at my memoir blog Wrote By Rote and my dream blog A Faraway View.   If you want to try your hand at memoir writing or impart some advice regarding what you know about writing memoir, you can submit your guest post on this blog that publishes every Saturday.   On Thursdays, my dream blog is extending an invitation to anyone who has dreams to share or who would like to discuss their theories and thoughts on what dreams are and what they mean.    Please check out both of those blogs to see if you might have something you'd like to offer.  Creativity is calling you.

           We are also accepting guest posts at the A to Z Blog.     Many spaces are available on that site and we have a place for you.  Your post there doesn't strictly have to be about the A to Z Challenge either.  Stephen Tremp has been presenting a fascinating series on science every other Thursday.  On Fridays Nicole Ayers offers fun and diversion to start your weekend off right.  We've had many of you offer a whole range of topics at the site--everything from A to Z and I'm not talking about the Challenge.   If you've got something you want to present to the A to Z community this is the place to do it.

           My thanks to everyone who has signed up for Hijack This Blog! so far.   And also thanks to those who have signed up on the other sites or who will be soon.   I'm looking forward to the posts that are coming up.


           Have you signed up for one of my guest posts yet?  If so, would you like to tell us what you'll be presenting?    If you haven't signed up for a spot, is there something that's holding you back?   

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Dressing Up for Halloween

         Some of you, especially those of you with children, might be thinking of shopping for Halloween costumes these days.  Maybe you've already bought something.  Some will choose to be creative and make the costumes yourself or patch something together from things you have lying around the house.  Pumpkins and Halloween decorations are all over the stores.  It's kind of difficult not to notice that Halloween will soon be here.

          I won't be dressing up for that festive day, but I have been dressing up--or dressing down--my blog of late.  Over the last few weeks we've looked at some of the changes and you readers have been giving me some fine feedback.   I've done some major blog cleaning, split up into multiple blogs, and you may have noticed a new header design.

         I've altered the color scheme of my header and removed the reference to the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge.  After all this is where the Challenge started, but now it's got a new home.  If you haven't visited the A to Z Blog and become a follower I hope you will do so today.   News about the Challenge should start coming in soon and I don't want anyone to miss it.

          Tossing It Out may have a new header with a new slogan--Juggling words and phrases--but the blog content will remain pretty much the same.   Although now if I write anything about dreams it will most likely appear on A Faraway View (my dream blog).   I will still include some memoir material on this blog, but some of that will now be diverted to the memoir blog Wrote By Rote.

          Speaking of which, Susan Kane of thecontemplativecat challenged me a while back to write a blog post about adventuresome food.   I decided to delay this challenge to deliver as a Halloween post.  It's not really all that related to Halloween, but there was just something about the topic that made me think the post would be appropriate then.  I'll be posting this story coming this Friday October 28.

           On Wednesday October 26,  I'll be visited with a guest post by Stephanie Campbell who hosted me earlier on her blog So You Want to Be a Writer?.  Stephanie's got a special Halloween story that features characters from her latest book Poachers.  Don't miss this fun little tale and say hello to Stephanie.

           In the upcoming week I may be more lax than usual making rounds to visit your blogs since I'm here in Tennessee and may not be on the computer as much.  Next Monday, which is Halloween, I'll be back to normal--kind of.  What the heck is normal anyway?

             Are you dressing up for Halloween?   What are the hot costumes this year?  Have you linked to the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge Blog yet to encourage your readers to join up?

         

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