Oh for the good old days when life was simpler and more fun and the world was a better place than it is now. Looking back it seems kind of nice to be a kid and let my parents worry about the bills and all of the logistics of keeping things going. All I had to do was just play and enjoy my life. Life was so much easier back then. Or so I've heard people say. But in reality was the past really all that good compared to now?
I guess a lot of young people roll their eyes when older folk reminisce about how much better things were in the past. When I was a kid I enjoyed hearing the stories of the youths of my parents and grandparents, but those older times didn't sound all that much better. What would have been so great about walking three miles to school in the snow? I doubt that my parents actually had to do that, but it's one of those cliched stories many of us might have heard at one time or another.
When I was a kid our family wasn't necessarily wealthy, but I didn't ever go hungry and we always had a decent place to live. Christmases were abundant times and summers were easygoing and gay. And back then "gay" meant carefree and happy. There were things to worry about when I was in elementary school, but nothing especially major as far as things in my immediate world.
The years of junior high and high school brought with it a few concerns, but not much that couldn't be kept in check without too much effort. I may have been tottering on the cusp of adulthood and yet I could still be stupid and get away with it without too much rigmarole. Essentially I was a good kid and most everyone else I knew back then was okay too. A few were outstanding, while some of us had our shining moments that stood out among the typical mundanity of everyday life. Glory days for some and boring days for others and for the many of us they were just the days to get through in order to get where we were going in life wherever that was.
Were "the good old days" really all that great? I remember worrying about getting drafted to fight in Viet Nam. A lot of guys my age went and thanks to a draft number near 300 getting drafted was unlikely in my case. I stayed home and muddled my way through some college. Fighting a war was not something I wanted to do and thank goodness I didn't have to go, but still it was something I worried about to some degree.
Then before I knew it the whole being a kid, a teenager, and a confused youth was over and I was an adult. Somehow being grown up didn't seem all that different in a lot of ways. Now I had that privilege of being able to look back upon my own good old days. The older I got, the older those days got until the past became dreamlike in many ways and often a unreliable source of history because it was the past of which I was a part of in some manner of speaking. Since leaving those good old days I often have to relate to them through things I read or see on television. I'll watch an old movie that takes place when I was younger and often think to myself, "I don't remember it quite like that."
The past seems like an interesting place to visit, but I'm not sure that I'd want to live there. It's not that my memories are bad. Far from that, my memories are good for the most part. But those memories are skewed because they are my memories. If I could go back in time to see what the past was like, there are many points of history I'd want to see. However the places, people, and times of my past are of special interest to me. Were they really like I thought they were or was there a lot that I missed that would be important pieces of my personal puzzle that would be of great significance to know? In many ways I think the actuality of it all would be that my life was even better than I remember. It's been a good life. Maybe the days of the world weren't always the best, but my old days were just fine.
Do you remember the past as "good old days"? What was particularly good or bad about your own past in comparison to the state of the world and culture at that same time? Is there another time in which you'd prefer to live over the present?
This post relates to the theme of my upcoming Battle of the Bands on Friday July 1st. I'll be presenting two different songs--one which is named in this post--by two different artists who worked together at times and had somewhat parallel careers. One reached megastardom while the other was known to a number of music fans only having a modest success until his passing in 2015. Give a guess if you like, but be here on Friday for the answer.
Photo credit: http://jokideo.com/i-remember-the-good-old-days/
I've never looked back and thought those were the good ole days. The best time is now. Sure I can relate to the snap, crackle and pop. A younger me would be nice, but I don't want to go back to get it.
ReplyDeleteAlex, there is a lot about the present that I disdain, but I'm sure happy about so many of the advances technology. Much of the moral climate is disturbing though.
DeleteLee
Well I am glad that social media and digital photography wasn't around when I was a kid doing stupid things. Like you hear that bombastic hateful windbag Trump saying 'make America great again'. When exactly was that? Vietnam war times? Energy crisis? Inflation? Segregation? Great Depression?
ReplyDeleteJoJo, I didn't do all that many stupid things that I wouldn't have wanted to capture for posterity. I'd love to have more photo memories from my younger days. I couldn't afford to take many photos and I had a lousy camera anyway.
DeleteAmerica is still great in many ways, but I think we have seen greater days despite those bad things you mention. I'm proud to be an American because of what this country has represented and accomplished. I think in recent years we've been heading down the wrong road.
Lee
Hi, Lee!
ReplyDeleteYou and I are roughly the same age and your memories of youth are very similar to mine. I had the benefit of a stable, two parent home environment, enjoyed life's simple pleasures and had some great times. However the Cold War, school air raid drills and fallout shelters were daily reminders that the tranquility of our lives could be shattered in an instant. Like you I faced the Viet Nam draft. I was attending Paterno State at the time. My number was 125 as I recall, and I was not summoned for duty. In the decades since I have often experienced survivor's remorse. The 1960s were turbulent years with assassinations, the Viet Nam conflict and the widening generation gap. Yet I remember my youth as a time when most people faced the future with optimism, with a sense that everything was going to work out and that we were going to be okay. I don't think today's young people have that same sense of security and optimism. It broke my heart recently to see that viral picture of a three year old girl standing on the toilet seat at home practicing what she was taught at school - how to hide from an invading shooter. Children as young as three should not have to worry about homegrown terror and mass killings. That is one big difference between then and now. When I was a child the threats came from places far away. Today they come from within our borders and follow us wherever we go - to school, to the mall, to the movie theater and to church.
Thanks, Lee!
Shady, we are indeed of a similar mindset on this. Like you indicate, the threats we faced almost seemed mythical like something people talked about but we never truly expected. Now the threats are all too real. And from the standpoint of personal futures in respect to career and raising families there is so much less security now. Hope seems to be gone in many ways.
DeleteLee
I remember certain aspects of the past as the good old days, but I see many aspects of my present as the better days.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
Janie, that's pretty much how I see it. And besides there is so much I can't exactly remember about those days of my past in respect to how the world really was as opposed to my own little world.
DeleteLee
Some things were nicer. Paying less to get by. Less responsibility. Credit scores didn't define a person's ability to pay for something. I missed out on Vietnam and the energy crisis. Some things are better and some are worse.
ReplyDeleteRuth, I think we can always find the pluses and minuses of any time and if our present is pretty good then we tend to favor it and vice versa.
DeleteLee
I'm trying to look to the future at present, though with the state the UK is in regarding Europe heaven knows what will happen.
ReplyDeleteYvonne.
Yvonne, the UK is at an historic crossroads that creates a sense of uneasiness for many of us. But what is happening there reflects what many people all over the globe feel about the world situation. Keep the faith and hang it there!
DeleteLee
Karen, I get far more distraught watching what is happening now. The past is done with so I'm fascinated to watch it, but it doesn't upset me so much. Some of the news now gives me fits of anxiety to the point that I have to shut it off and do other things that are more relaxing.
ReplyDeleteLee
I don't long for the past. Though I didn't really think about it at the time, we were really poor and worked really hard growing up on the family farm. Our family was close so that was good but I wouldn't want to be in that spot again. I look forward most of the time, not back. The good old days were rough.
ReplyDeleteSusan GK, your situation growing up sounds like a blessing in that you learned much from it and given good guidance as you went forward. My family was close growing up which is why we're close now. Often seeming to be "poor" is a greater advantage to facing the realities of life than being coddled and privileged.
DeleteLee
I so remember my "good old days." They were far enough back that we also used "gay." Someone was having a dandy time!!!
ReplyDeleteI was born in 1945. In the early fifties I remember my older sisters wearing twirly skirts, pumps - high heels, white blouses with white collars and bright red lipstick. Oh those were the days. No I don't want to go back to that time but I honestly think when we say something about the "good old days" we really want to return to the days of wine and roses and innocence. I always think of the past as being less complicated - because I was young and didn't have worries about a complicated life. ie, no worries, innocence, excited about the future ahead. I'm taken back to that period and all those sweet feelings when I hear CDs of Fats Domino or Ray Orbison singing some of those great oldies. Thanks for helping me to remember what those "days" were like.
BW, I agree that "good old days" is usually a reference to the pleasant memories that stand out and a glossing over of a lot of the hassles back then. I'm sure there were plenty of complications that my parents had to face that I just wasn't aware of in being a kid.
DeleteLee
Thanks for this peaceful stroll down Memory Lane! Operative word; peaceful. Who would not miss a time when differences were not met with violence or death and children could still play outside? I'm well aware of having had the good fortune to know the 'good times' before they were gone. I wish I could imagine how we could ever be peaceful again after so much corruption and chaos, but at least there's always hope. Thanks for reminding me, Lee :-)
ReplyDeleteDiedre, if I had kids today I doubt whether I'd give them the same free reign that I had when I was a kid. We hardly ever heard of really bad stuff happening back then although I know some of it still happened--just not on the scope that it does now.
DeleteLee
rigmarole...a word not heard recently.A time I would want to visit? I would go to the years when my kids were 3,5, and 9. They weren't easy, but our children had such a sense of adventure.
ReplyDeleteSusan K, going back to when my kids were younger might tell me something about my parenting skills. However my kids always reassure me that I was a great father and they had wonderful childhoods so I guess I'm okay with that.
DeleteLee
Don't let "I shoulda/coulda" done better, been a better parent, take away any good stuff you know you did. Guilt is a terrible burden to carry. Loosen the load.
DeleteSusan K, guilt is trying to take on a responsibility for something you cannot change so what's the point? You are right about letting it go.
DeleteLee
We tend to forget the past had its share of troubles, too. I still have very fond memories of our 4 years in ALB - newlyweds, the great outdoors to explore, the Balloon Fiesta, no humidity... But I also worked one of my least favorite jobs when we lived there. So it wasn't all good.
ReplyDeleteL.Diane, I think memory depends a lot on the type of person doing the remembering. I've known a lot of people who remember only the bad things while others emphasize the good. Sometimes I'll be sharing the same times and same memories with someone and we both see it all from far different perspectives.
DeleteLee
Yep, the "good ole days" are a myth. But they are a myth people believe, much to the detriment of us all.
ReplyDeleteI could get into the psychology of that, but it would take too much time that I don't have at the moment.
Andrew, a lot of it comes down to personal mythology because not all people see it the same way. The psychology primarily has to do with a person's perception of where they arrived in life as opposed to where they thought they'd be and how much they focus on the negative in the first place. Also it's a matter of how people define the past and what their own interests are. Someone might be fixated on a specific decade or era even if they weren't born yet and it's something about that period in history that draws their interest. Or it might be just that perception of a person's specific memories of that time of their life that was particularly good and they have a difficult time breaking free. The "good ole days" can me many things depending on who's doing the retrospecting.
DeleteLee
Good question, Lee. I think that maybe the best anyone can do is brighten the corner where they are. Mother Teresa had the right idea. She lived in a terrible place, but she made a positive difference. The truth is we all live in a terrible place, but we all can make a positive difference. We just have to decide that we want to, right???
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure that answered your question. I don't think anything has really changed over the course of time. Human nature doesn't really change. Ergo, it's the same stuff over and over again.
Robin, the way I see it is that the only place we can make a difference is in the present and what we do now can have an effect on the future. We can learn from past and it can be entertaining and interesting to think about the past, but when we try to dwell in the past then it can be a huge problem for some and an annoyance to folks around somebody who is stuck in the past too much.
DeleteLee
I have a much shorter perspective on what is "the good old days, partly affected by differences in responsibilities and age. The late 1990's didn't seem to be that bad. As for the parent's "good old days," the 1970's sounded pretty good once Viet Nam was over. I adore 1960's and 1970's classic rock. And the frivolous yé-yé music from France in the mid-1960's.
ReplyDeletePop Tart, sometimes we are better to make the distinction between what we liked about the culture about a certain era as opposed to making a value judgement between now and then. Those comparisons can be difficult to make and there are so many variables involved. The music of the 1960's and 70's is some of my favorite.
DeleteLee
Most people's view of the past has a rose tint on it, and since you can't go back anyway, there's not much percentage in wishing for it.
ReplyDeleteA lot of the "advances" we've made in the last thirty years have two sides to them.
I love being able to use my phone to stream music from my collection almost anywhere-not long ago, we had to be home to listen to it.
But at a wedding over the weekend, I missed a lot of the impact of my neice's toast to her sister (the bride) because some ignorant thirty-something held up a iPad to film the toast. At that point, I wish cellular technology had never been invented. Ditto for idiots who text in movies-news flash-the light is distracting.
I did a recent post on the Amazon devices, and Stephen T. McCarthy made a comment about the technology doing everything for us. That's coming. There's a current car commercial about technology to sense objects and correct your driving-how long before the cars drive for us?
In the good old days, you couldn't go to a store at night or on Sunday, you had to wash clothes and dishes by hand, you had four television channels and had to flip the record over after twenty minutes.
They weren't 100% good, and they are not coming back. Even the whole "vinyl record renaissance" is only a few million pieces sold a year.
So be careful about looking back...better to watch where you're going!
Larry, I remember a lot of what you've mentioned. When I was a kid my mother and grandmother both had old wringer washers and hung clothes out to dry. Today's technology makes so many things easier and they take much less time to do. Technology probably has more up sides than downsides. We have just about everything at our immediate access. It's almost frightening to think what might happen if somehow we lost the ability to do these things like for example a massive power grid failure. I'm not sure we'd survive long if such a thing happened for too many days. Our culture would probably descend into chaos and only the hardiest survivalists would get through it. Here I am going to the extremes, but it's probably a very likely scenario.
DeleteLee
On the flight back from my neice's wedding on Sunday the wi-fi was not operational, and most of the passengers acted like life as we know it was over.
DeleteNot too long ago, your choice of entertainment on a flight was a book.
I actually think a grid failure would result in less chaos only because I think people would be slow to react-they are used to so much "input."
After that, they'd learn to (gasp) talk to each other (which our technology seems to discourage).
Larry, I think the first 24 hours or so of power failure would be manageable, but if stores were closed, gas was not available, and there was limited awareness of what was happening or what to do I think cities especially would be a bad scenario. I don't really want to find out though.
DeleteLee
I think what made them the "good old days" was that I was young and healthy, and people I loved were still around. The thing that's funny is, we never thought of them as good times back when we were having them. In fact, we kind of thought they sucked. All those days when we thought there was nothing to do... if we could have banked that time and used it when we were older and knew what to do with it...
ReplyDeleteJohn, it mostly comes down to outlook. I was always pretty content where I was, but I knew plenty of people who were always miserable seeming. "Good old days" can mean a lot of different things depending on what we're thinking about.
DeleteLee
The most I've wished for was going back to my childhood so I didn't have to pay bills. Remembering how money really wasn't an issue sounds like a dream. The only thing I'd have to deal with is when I wanted something, I'd need mom and dad to buy it, but as an adult, I realize a lot of those things I didn't need to begin with.
ReplyDeletePatricia, I always wished I had more money when I was a kid, but I could really stretch out what I had. Our priorities as kids were often pretty frivolous.
DeleteLee
Right there with you on this one. I'm beginning to learn that little trick that memory plays of "combining events" that seemed so clear not long ago. I can see that one day the events won't be as important as the feelings they bring back.
ReplyDeleteCW, so true. Memories can be better to live with than to live in.
DeleteLee
I was just talking to someone about how great it was being a kid. No lists to make. Food appeared on the table regularly. My bed was always clean. I did have to make it, but big deal. No wonder I had so much time.
ReplyDeleteC.Lee, I had a great childhood and a great family life. If there were many bad experiences, most have been washed over with the good memories. If I were condemned to live my life over again it wouldn't be such a bad thing. Hopefully I'd pay closer attention the second time around so that I'd remember more.
DeleteLee
Yeah, the only thing worth revisiting in the past was my body. I'd kidnap it. Otherwise, I like who I am today and love my life. My whole life has been good. I've had my trials, but I just try to learn from them and push forward. There might be a couple of things I might try to redo, like understand my son better and maybe help him more, if possible, back then. But my family and I are very close.
ReplyDeleteAnyhoo, sorry about your medical scare. This is why I don't like being away from my bloggers. I could have been praying for you. Hope all is well. Enjoy your exciting trip, too.
Teresa, you and I think similarly about this whole thing. Life was good, but it continues to be good and I look forward to many more good years.
DeleteYour prayers are always welcomed, but I had a good prayer chain putting in good words for me so things are going great. I'm good to go now.
Lee
Actually my dad did walk to school every day but it was 10 miles and he had his dad's pants that were held up by a rope not a belt and often no socks! He was poor as heck! I think every generation can say "the good ole days" because they are looking through rose coloured glasses. I do think kids and adults have things quite easy for the most part more than ever. There are so many fast food places and convenience stores everywhere and people can just get anything they want now due to credit rather than having to wait. I almost think that people are using less and less of their imagination because everything is so readily available. Now, that being said, it is nice to have what we do have now. We don't have to wait for a couple of years before the movie come to tv. We can see it al out right away...this is just one example. I shudder at the thought of having to use oil lamps for light. I am happy in my present....I like my past but it is the past and I hope the future brings more rewards than hardships. I do wish more kids would play like we used to but who am I? Whe. They are our age, they will look back and shake their heads t the next set coming up.
ReplyDeleteInstant gratification and everything easy is what it's about in our era. I guess this is pretty much how it's been to some degree in all my 65 years of living, but now access is all on hyperspeed.
DeleteLee
Most of the "good ol' days" I choose to forget because I didn't think they were so good. I had some trials and tribulations I wouldn't mind having never having to go through. I did have some fun when it came to music and sports but those things didn't last overly long, even while I was doing them.
ReplyDeleteMitch, most stuff I think back on as okay and don't remember hardly any of it. At least not in great detail.
DeleteLee
In some ways, the old days were good ones for me: My grandparents were alive, my grandma was healthy, Christmas had lots of goodies, and playing in the neighborhood was relatively safe. We had our freedom. We were never hungry, without clothing, or homeless. We knew where we'd be on Christmas and Thanksgiving.
ReplyDeleteIn other ways, those days were horrible and I would not want to return to these parts of my life way back when: domestic violence, crying myself to sleep, wondering when they were going to kill each other, wondering why my mama hated me, wondering when it was okay to talk and would I get slapped for it (I did have a sassy mouth!). Dreading school and the teasing and extreme emotional turmoil it brought with it. Being scared of the teacher because of what he did to me. Wanting to run away, but having nowhere to go.
Now, I don't live with those same fears, but others have taken their place. Uncertainty rules my life in many ways and I don't do well with the unknown. I wish that I could go back to the time in my life that my grandparents and Aunt Mae were alive, but if I could, I would not bring them out of Heaven into the awful world this place has become. I look forward to when I can go to them instead.
I love my daddy and miss him something fierce. However, I do not miss the terror that was my childhood and, thankfully, Heavenly Father has allowed my faulty memory to remove or block most of it from immediate recall.
I hope that you're recovering well, Arlee. Have a blessed week!
Suzanne, if we could just have all the good stuff and edit out the bad stuff, we'd all have pretty decent life stories. But every experience means something so I guess we should look for the message in each and use it to our advantage.
DeleteLee
I agree. Lessons were learned. It made me who I am. The buck stopped with me and my children never experienced those types of things.
DeleteIn comparing my childhood with those of others that I know, I have come to the conclusion that, though mine wasn't the prettiest, it was the most honest. There were no out-of-the-blue surprises once I became an adult. Theirs were Leave It to Beaver lives on the surface only. Deceptions ran deep in their "perfect" homes. Parents divorced as soon as the kids were on their own. Whether it is a good thing or a bad thing, my parents were together until they buried my daddy.
If I had to chose between a happy home and no grandparents or a bad home and having my grandparents, I would chose the one that included my grandparents. I will be forever grateful for having them in my life and for their Christian guidance.
Have a blessed week. :)
'Those were the days my friend, we thought they'd never end' - yes they were good days, good times, but we move ever onward to where we are now ... some good much that is not so good if we see the way of the world right now. Thanks Lee, interesting post. I count my blessings and am grateful for my life.
ReplyDeleteOr to quote another song, "These are the good old days." No stopping time or going back so we should savor what we have in the now.
DeleteLee
I remember how it was as a disabled to child and I do remember the ridicule as well as Mom fighting for me to get into regular school and fight battles to get what I needed. Nowadays the disabled is more understood as people (not their disability) and have a lot more resources and rights.
ReplyDeleteLisa, So much more awareness and accommodation now. We are more accustomed to different people with different needs and different cultures that most of us don't ridicule or treat others wrongly.
DeleteIt's a good thing.
Lee
I love living in today's world, in spite of the turmoil and scary happenings. I love modern technology, new discoveries, today's books and movies. We live in interesting times, and I am grateful.
ReplyDeletePatricia, not many modern conveniences that I'd want to give up--not for long at least.
DeleteLee
I definitely think of my past as "the good ole days"...I'd love to go back there. Although I did have some measure of trauma in my past, I made the best of it and my younger days were absolutely a blast. I'm speaking mainly of the 70s, my high school and early college years. But my childhood also holds some very ear memories for me. A tight-knit family, all who knew how to have a good time, and tons of friends kept me laughing and rolling in good times. When I look back, my heart aches for those times. Sure there were bad times, but I think I was so fortunate to have the kind of family and friends that made those bad times bearable and essentially all better. I consider myself to be very blessed.
ReplyDeleteToday is okay, but I sure had a lot more fun back in the good ole days... I miss them for sure.
Michele at Angels Bark
Michele, I don't think many people would say that they didn't have some "trauma" in their lives, but if we went back to see those moments they might seem far less traumatic that we thought they were at the time. I wish I could remember more in the past, but often it seems I was passing through those years with my eyes half-closed and my mind on things other than the time I was in.
DeleteLee
My childhood was just as much a mix of good and bad as my current life, so I have no interest in going back. I can remember the good times fondly, but I also all too often think about the bad times. I'm perfectly happy to keep moving forward in interesting times.
ReplyDeleteShannon, the present is where we live so it's best to focus on that part of our lives.
DeleteLee
Hello from the A to Z Post-Challenge Road Trip. It’s nice to stop by and visit via this more leisurely route.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your thoughts on the good ole days.
Have a wonderful day!
Trisha Faye
www.trishafaye.wordpress.com
www.embracinglifetribe.wordpress.com
Trisha, right about now is when A to Z seems to be part of the good old days. Enjoy your blog browsing and have a great summer.
DeleteLee
I think most people remember their past fondly. As we age, it's nice to think back to our younger days. That said, my childhood was dysfunctional in many ways and I wouldn't want to go that far back.
ReplyDeleteDebbie D., I like to think about my past but I wish I could travel back to clarify some of it.
DeleteLee
A lot of times we think back to the good old days, but they took place (mostly) during our youth. Sure, things seemed simple, but we also had to listen to our parents, we had restrictions, no mode of transportation, most likely no money to buy whatever we wanted. Now that we are older, we can afford to go where we want and buy what we want. When we think back to the good ol' days and the gay ol' times we had, we can relieve through DVD's, ebay & Amazon purchases. Were the good old days good? Yes. But as you say, it would be an ice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there. I like it here where I am just fine.
ReplyDeleteJeffrey, yeah, if we aren't content in the now then that's a problem cause that's all we really got--everything else is just illusion.
DeleteLee