Have you ever thought about the possibility of losing your memory? If you had kept a journal of the days of your life, now and then you could read it to remember things you had done in the past. I can recall things that have happened that at the time I believed I would remember the rest of my life and then later never think about it again. There are people whom I figured would always be around and then they're gone and I forget so much of the good times I had with them. Memory can be a great friend, but it can also be our biggest deceiver... |
| Private journal, Diary of Henriette Dessaulles, 1874, Ink on paper, 21 x 14 cm (Photo credit: Wikipedia) |
Journal of Days
Time passes along with births, deaths, marriages, graduations, or this event or that event. The world happens as histories are inscribed for future generations to learn and study-- or misremembered for the sake of societal deception until they are corrected by historians untainted by bias, if indeed those histories are ever made right. Kingdoms may rise and fall, but time remains the constant--a stoic witness to all that passes in a never ending procession of minutes, hours, years, and centuries. Humankind may have discerned the devices for measuring the passage of time, but time itself outlives us all.
Everything we do or think about has some relation to time. Our lives are centered around time as time revolves all around us in the activities of the world outside of ourselves. I used to keep a schedule book in which I recorded upcoming events. Sometimes in the same book or a different record book I'd keep track of meals, gas, motels, and information about the working facilities where we performed the touring show that I managed in the eighties.
Working on the road with a performance schedule, one takes careful note of time. Typically, cast members would leave the motel by check-out, drive a few hours to the next town, have lunch, and then from about 4 until about 9:30 PM we'd set up and then perform our show before tearing it down and moving on. My main tools were my watch, my road atlas, and my trip record book and my journal of days.
Rarely did I get into detail then or in any other attempts to keep journals in my lifetime. There were a few times when I would burst into an ambitious attempt to keep an actual daily journal. The best journal--one that I kept while on a several week hitchhiking trip during the summer of 1971--that journal got stolen in 1981 when our van was broken into in the Holiday Inn parking lot across from the police station in Greeley, Colorado. Lost some good stuff and that kind of dampered my applying much future effort into journaling.
Now most of my days are the same. Not much point in keeping a journal of my days as they pass by. The closest I come to keeping that journal is my blogging. Other kinds of writing would probably be good but I haven't been doing any of that. Just blogging and I do enjoy that activity.
Which brings me to the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge. This will be my journal of days in a sense over the month of April. Each post will take me time to write as well as take the time of whoever might read it. That writing will be part of my daily activity. Hours will pass as will days.
If I were keeping a journal I could reread my life whenever I wanted to--maybe even some day if I needed to.
Do you keep a daily journal? Have you ever found a journal of a relative or someone else? Are you concerned that one day you might lose your memory and sense of who you are?
Thought provoking Lee. I have always prided myself on my good memory so have never kept a journal, however as one do get older we do get "Senior Moments", and I am so aware of Demential that comes with age, as I said your post is thought provoking.
ReplyDeleteYvonne.
Yvonne, I've also prided myself on my good memory, but sometimes this old memory seems to be less reliable than it used to be.
DeleteLee
Lee, I kept a Diary when I was a teen but I wasn't faithful in keeping daily entries before abandoning it altogether. As an adult college, career, and the raising a family kept the desire to journal at bay but a part of me secretively wanted to record my days no matter how small or uneventful my life is in the big universe. A few months ago I began tracking my thoughts but I'm not consistent. Hopefully I'll develop a good pattern over time. Oh I definitely worry about losing my memory. Other older relatives no longer with us developed dementia, so chances are good this will be my ill fate but I know my future is in God's hands. I've been kind to my body over the years, so maybe God will give me a sharp memory in my twilight years. :) Good post, my friend and thank you for visiting!
ReplyDeletePlease JUMP over to look at today's edition of Art Sketching Through the Alphabet Letter "J". Happy A2Zing y'all!
Cathy, even an inconsistent attempt at maintaining a journal is better than not doing anything at all. It's a habit that has to be developed over time.
DeleteLee
I've kept a journal at certain points in the past. Rereading any of those is like looking in on another person's life. I tried to start on recently, but like you, my days don't change overall.
ReplyDeleteI've always taken photos though, and in a way, that's like journaling. Moments in time are captured.
L.Diane, now with mostly uneventful lives, I think it's as valuable to record our thoughts, feelings, and responses to world events and whatever is going on around us. Just talking about the weather or our physical state can be enlightening when read later in life.
DeleteAgreed that photos can provide great journalistic opportunities. Photo taking is something I don't do like I probably should.
Lee
Some interesting thoughts here. I have a habit of remembering things in a very skewed way - I know because my wife will usually relate a different version that is corroborated by the children. I've tried keeping a diary at various points when I was much younger. The longest was for four months while travelling round the world. Good to have a record like that. At least the blog will be there for posterity, unless some kind of major shutdown happens.
ReplyDeleteNick, it's always interesting to compare witness accounts. I like talking to my sister to compare notes about what we remember from childhood.
DeleteLee
I have attempted several times to journal on a daily basis, both in spiritual pursuit and in developing consistent writing habits. But I never ended up being consistent with it. I do wish I had kept a regular journal throughout my life. Like you, there are so many times that I figured would stay with me forever but the years have cast a hazy film on those memories and some are blacked out completely. A shame.
ReplyDeleteWhat a bummer about your hitchhiking journal being stolen! I would feel so violated. That was surely a treasure trove of documented experiences. I hate thieves. Time is a thief too, when you think about it...
Michele at Angels Bark
Michele, losing my trip journal is one of my most lamentable losses in my life. I really recorded that trip in precise detail and that account could never be fully recreated from memory like I had it recorded in that journal.
DeleteLee
Mine would be pretty boring if I ever did one. I'll stick to the blog at my sea. Losing one's memory would be awful, hopefully that never comes to pass.
ReplyDeletePat, it might be more interesting than you think, especially years down the road when you look back. And if you did start losing your memory even the dull old times might be good to bring back to light.
DeleteLee
I've never been much of a journaler, (journalist?!), aside from my blog. I've tried, but it just doesn't seem to stick.
ReplyDeleteThat someone would steal a journal...what kind of person does that? What could they possibly have hoped to get from it?
A to Z Challenge: Jane Storegoer and the Cone of Evil
Isa-Lee Wolf
A Bit 2 Read
@IsaLeeWolf
Isa-Lee, whoever stole my journal didn't target that, but they just broke into my van and stole a bunch of things including the briefcase where the journal was kept. I'm sure they probably just threw the journal and a lot of the other more personal stuff in the trash. So sad.
DeleteLee
You got me on 'read it if you lost your memory'. That sounds perfect, but then I wondered if it would be boring. Where's the plot, characters, rising action? My life has none of those. Maybe that's why I don't keep a journal!
ReplyDeleteJacqui, sometimes the plot and rising action become more evident as you reach the end of a story. Besides life isn't always as neatly structured as fiction and sometimes the journal is more like a series of sketches and random thoughts that can be restructured into a more coherent and interesting story.
DeleteLee
Debs, my mother used to always clam up if we tried to record her telling a story, but otherwise she's was always full of things to tell us. Now we have to rely on our memories of what she said when she was still alive. You're right about capturing the feelings sometimes being of more value than the events.
ReplyDeleteLee
I keep a journal and have done for just about always! It's not that a-m-a-z-i-n-g things happen but I keep a bit of a record ..
ReplyDeleteSusan S., that life record is what would be good to have. Reading what we've written many years ago can be very enlightening as to who we were and a clue to the journey we took later.
DeleteLee
Hi Lee - I've never kept a journal - hopeless at that sort of thing ... but actually not having kids - it's probably not been that important and I am not important in life - also thankfully. Again there are various family books published which cover family subjects - so those records are there for me to tap into ...
ReplyDeleteI hope you've got yours for your family ... cheers Hilary
Hilary, you are important in life! Your talent at expressing facts could be helpful to someone in the future besides being potentially helpful to you one day.
DeleteLee
I regularly kept journals (often daily) from September 1989 to early 2009, and then have kept falling back into and out of the habit. My journalling really suffered due to my dysfunctional relationship with my ex, where I put him and his 1,001 issues before everything, even myself. It's hard to not only get back into the habit, but stay in it longer than a few months at a stretch now.
ReplyDeleteI named my journals since the second, and since the third, I've named them after songs. I've had Helena, Cecilia, Rita, Prudence, Rael, Athena, Emily, Zelda, Eloise, and now Khanada. I almost always refer to people by fake names, starting with the first letter of their surnames. I started doing that because I intended to publish my journals once upon a time. The habit just stuck.
Carrie-Anne, you've got a good track record for keeping a journal for a long term. I can understand how something in life can take us away from faithful journaling. I used to use fake names and initials and cryptic references when I kept a dream journal.
DeleteLee
I kept a journal in college. A lot of the things I didn't keep note of have been forgotten. A lot of names I never imagined I would forget have been forgotten.
ReplyDeleteThe idea of losing large chunks of memory is scary to me.
Harry, it's so easy to forget things once they've passed in time. At one time I could remember the names of just about every kid I went to elementary school with and now I think I'd have a problem recalling a good many of those names.
DeleteLee
You must have been upset when your hitchhiking journal got stolen! Makes you wonder what kind of lowlife would steal something so personal. :( I kept a diary for a couple of years as a teenager, but not since. Photos are great memory joggers. I have lots of old ones and take plenty of new ones. Sadly, many more have been lost over the years, including miles of video footage that my father shot in the '60s from places like Pisa and Egypt, when he was on military missions. Like you, I use blogging as a kind of journal. Memoirs make up a good percentage of my writing, including this year's A to Z theme.
ReplyDeleteDebbie D, I was very upset, but I guess I got over it mostly. No point in dwelling upon it. I'm afraid I'll lose a lot of my old videos if I don't do some kind of a transfer. But I'm not sure I could afford transferring all those videos.
DeleteLee
I'm using the Passion Planner this year - and have had really enjoyed seeing my days/weeks and months have meaning and purpose as I look back and reflect on each one.
ReplyDeleteNancy, I had to look this up. Sounds like a good way to keep track of ones life.
DeleteLee
Oh, I have boxes and boxes of journals! But now, I want to digitize them. I still keep a paper journal, but also have a lot of journal entries in digital form, too.
ReplyDeleteI think a lot about memory and memory loss... Especially now, because my elderly father-in-law moved in with us last summer. It was a sudden move, brought on due to his dementia.
Since I work from home, we spend our days together. I have found that keeping an oldies station on (Rat Pack era stuff) is helpful. Hours may pass without Bob saying a word. I can even try to start a conversation, but if he's not "there" he just can't engage.
Every now and then, however, one of those oldies songs will trigger a memory in him and he will just start sharing an old story with me. I have a special file in Evernote for these stories. I want to be able to share them with his grandkids, for instance.
Happy A to Z! :)
Tui
My A to Z posts are here: TuiSnider.com
Also, A to Z posts from the #StoryDam Writing Community are here: StoryDam.com
Tui, one thing that concerns me about digitization is losing the data for one reason or another. The hard written copies seem more lasting and durable, but I understand wanting to condense everything and creating easier access with the tools digitizing offers.
DeleteGood idea to preserve those stories from your father-in-law before they become lost forever.
Lee
Odd that you wrote about journals. I have always kept a journal, until this past year. Just unearthed a stack of years past journals, a large stack of them. Always have kept a journal in places around the house.
ReplyDeleteThis year has been different for many reasons. Must start journaling again.
Susan, what a treasure trove in journals that you have. Someday you or someone will be happy those were kept. And yes, you should start journaling again.
DeleteLee
I used to write a boring daily journal about the things I did and ate and maybe they will help me someday if I write my memoirs. I also have some travel journals that are written in a hasty manner because I was having fun. They too could help me someday. Good post.
ReplyDeleteEve, I definitely think those could help in writing memoirs. It would be like assembling a puzzle or gathering clues.
DeleteLee
I did journal a bit but I found it is not my cup of tea. I am creating a journal for my friend so she can place her favourite quotes in There. I found a weekly calendar book and my dad had written in there..not every day but it was so nice to see what he was thinking. I found out that my dad was hired on April 27, 1927 at the age of 14 at a lumber camp. It was neat that he marked that down. There were other thoughts marked down and I was so happy to see this and showed it to my mom. Since then, I did not see it again and pray my mom did not get rid of it.....she could be weird like that.
ReplyDeleteBirgit, it would be neat to have stuff like that and bad to get rid of it. I've got some old stuff of my parents kind of like that.
DeleteLee
I try to keep records; but, they are incomplete. I'm afraid I am slack. I was going to keep up with the blogs I visited for A to Z. Well I have stopped the list. I should start it back up and add the comments I wrote. Of course, that is not a journal.
ReplyDeleteAnn, plans are kind of like that much of the time.
DeleteLee
My Dad kept a wonderful daily journal for most of his life. Many of the entries were in fact a bit mundane, just notes on what farm chores he accomplished, but his journals are a wealth of information and history of family and community and world events. I did keep a fairly good journal as a young woman, but at one point found that I was using it to complain about my life and challenges more than anything else, so stopped writing very often. I do still try to record major important family events, but most of my life record now is found in my weekly emails to my children and my blog posts. My A to Z posts for the past several years have focused on memories, so this has been wonderful for me!
ReplyDeleteMarcy, mundane is okay when you've got the detail. Little things and contemplations are good to have too. I've done memoir theme in past A to Z Challenges and it is fun.
DeleteLee
I had to keep a journal for a class I was taking when I was in my thirties. I thought it was a pain at the time, but I found it a couple months ago and enjoyed reading it so much I wished I had kept up with it.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, having lost my mom to Alzheimer's, I'm very afraid of losing my mind that way.
LD, writing regular journal entries is a habit that must be developed. It's easier when you just start doing it without thinking to much about it. You can always start again.
DeleteLee
As a young girl I kept a diary. In my thirties I kept spiritual journals. Blogging since 2005.
ReplyDeletePerspectives at Life & Faith in Caneyhead
Barbara, I've tried the spiritual journaling but that didn't last too long either.
DeleteLee
I've always had a brain like a sieve, and I found that waiting until the end of the day to write things down meant I forgot half of it before I got to write it down. Still, I kept a journal for a while, and would go through a period where I'd get sick of it and throw all of them away. I know, stupid, right?
ReplyDeleteNow that I think of it, it would have been a good exercise to have kept a journal of my days on the road, complete with itineraries, notes on airports and hotels, directions, flight experiences, as well as client information that I could have referred to as I went along, to capture problems I had with software and/or individuals I worked with or met along the way.But, woulda, coulda, shoulda, right?
John, I don't think I'd ever throw away a journal if I'd kept it, but I guess it can happen depending on how useful the journal entries seemed to be. I still have a lot of road records, but they are probably pretty scattered and not in any good order.
DeleteLee
I keep several journals but not necessarily a daily one. I do have one of my planners that acts like a journal for the year, but again, I don't always write in it daily, just the important stuff or sometimes quotes that I want to keep. I wish my grandparents had kept journals. I'm trying to collect as many memories from my mom as I can.
ReplyDeleteJanet
K is for Kihncert
Janet, get the memories from your mother while you can. I spent a lot of time asking my mother about the past and her memories in her last years, but I still have so many questions I'd like to ask her.
DeleteLee
I did have journals or diaries when I was younger, but they were usually about a teenager's feelings that I did not want others to read. I tried to keep them safe, of course, though I wonder now how much my mother probably read from the one she gave me.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, my J post was about "Joyce Kilmer" and his famous poem: As Lovely as a Tree