California seemed like a good idea to me once many years ago, but now my focus is again on the eastern United States. I guess it's a matter of roots...
Eastward Focus
Eventually I'd like to move back east. Since I'm married it has to be either a mutual decision or a matter of me just going on my own. The latter doesn't seem to be a particularly good idea since I do love my wife and her happiness is maybe more important than my own.
I tend to find a contentment wherever I am. This might be a matter of a transient state during childhood--we moved a few times from one extreme to another so that I've learned to adapt. And there are a number of aspects in Los Angeles that appeal to me.
Maybe I should have stated at the outset that I currently live in the Los Angeles area--have lived here for 29 years now. Moving here was a choice that I made in what almost seems like another life. At the time it seemed like the best thing that I could do, but years have passed and my situations have changed. In this stage of my life now, living in a state like Virginia or Tennessee seems like a nice place to settle in for retirement.
Nearly always, my thoughts, my focus is in the eastern part of the United States. All of my kids are in New Jersey or Virginia. Living back there would make it much easier to see them, my grandchildren, and other family and friends. So I dream of being there, perhaps living in a house on a nice parcel of land, away from the bustle of the urban area like that in which I currently dwell. At my age I don't need a lot of things to do or places to shop. Small town life would suit me just fine, but I don't know if my wife would like it. Besides, she's got family here in California so that is her main draw.
So here I am, not in so much of a dilemma, but in a state of longing for a dream that perhaps could be mine. Maybe, one day, or maybe not. The scales are balanced as far as weighing out benefits of either outcome. I'll be okay here in L.A. as long as things remain pretty much as they have been in recent years.
Of course, nothing ever really stays the same. Nor should it. For now I'll deal with it. I'll let tomorrow be a surprise. Hopefully a pleasant one.
Is there somewhere other than where you are now that you'd like to settle? Do you prefer a city or a rural life? For you, is the grass usually greener on the other side?
I would rather be somewhere else than Connecticut. Unfortunately, most of, if not all of, New England is corrupted with Democratic gov'nors and extreme political correctness which in turn is driving most of those states into the ground economically/socially.
ReplyDeleteSo I'm not quite sure where else I would want to go that isn't too terribly infected economically/socially.
GB, New England also gets colder than I like. Guess I could get used to it, but these days I even get cold here in L.A. Not into that governmental situation like you describe either--it would be like CA I think.
DeleteLee
Lee,
ReplyDeleteYour kids and other family are on this side of the country, so I understand your longings. I also understand your wife wishing to stay in California to be near her family. I think you're very, very sweet to place her happiness above yours. That's the heart of true love. Maybe in time, your idea to settle back East will grow on your wife. It'll give her family a new part of the country to visit and sure is nice here, especially with the Smoky's and Blue Ridge Parkway nearby. I grew up in a rural environment but I have no desire to live in one unless the nearby towns had a lot of conveniences that I'm now accustomed to. The area of Virginia that you shared with us is a nice place and not too far from Bristol Virginia/Tennessee which is the biggest city that's close to your small town dream. Even closer still is Abingdon which has a hospital and many of the popular big box stores. Going on what I've learned from you, I think you'd be happy living there. Who knows maybe your wife will like a slower place of living by the time she's ready to retire. It does take adjustment but it can grow on you if you're open minded. Wishing you the very best with your eastward future plans, my friend!
Cathy's Pinup Girl #AtoZChallenge Art Sketch Series ('E')
Cathy, my wife seems dead set against going where I dream of being--she doesn't even want to discuss it. Hope we don't wait until some nightmare situation in CA makes her wish we had left for the eastern U.S. but it will be too late. Then again maybe all will be fine here. I just take life as it comes my way.
DeleteLee
My family is in Oregon but no way I'd want to move to the West coast again. I like the conservative South. Although sometimes ABQ calls to me and I miss the desert a lot.
ReplyDeleteL.Diane, after having lived in the South for so many years prior to moving to CA I can say that the South has better values over all. Without the government and a lot of the people, California would be a wonderful place to be. It is now, but I've become apprehensive about what is to come in the future in this state.
DeleteLee
Maybe you'll still get a chance to move back east. (I have no idea how anyone can afford to live in LA.) It's slower and bit friendlier here.
ReplyDeleteAlex, I couldn't afford to move here now and be on social security. AS things are we've got a mortgage payment that is relatively low and my wife still makes a decent amount. We mostly stay home and don't spend much.
DeleteLee
I'd want to settle somewhere quiet and definitely with close access to family. Not particularly fond of big cities, in the eastern hemisphere big cities are super congested and competitive and hustly-bustly not my cup of tea.
ReplyDeleteAll of USA I've seen is either scenic rural or has gorgeous art-deco skyscrapers to die for!
Nilanjana, one nice thing about where I live is that there is a vast population all around, but still it doesn't feel excessively crowded (at least if I stay off the freeways). It's a nice urban area as far as those things go, but if the infrastructure ever collapsed this place might be a nightmare.
DeleteLee
I grew up in the country. While I'm not a 'hip city slicker', it would be a hard transition back now.
ReplyDeleteCW, mostly I've grown up in suburbia settings which were on the fringe of rural. Best of both worlds would be nice I think.
DeleteLee
I've always been a city person, and absolutely hate suburbia. I can't wait to finally be back in a real city. Ideally, I want to go home to Pittsburgh, but I'd love to live in NYC, Boston, or San Francisco if normal people could afford to live there. Although my favorite aunt often invites me to move to Sarasota, Florida to be near her and my grandma, and I love that city also.
ReplyDeleteCarrie-Anne, cities appealed to me to a certain extent when I was younger, but not so much now. I prefer the outskirts or suburbs because that essentially the type of surroundings I've mostly lived.
DeleteNew York City or another such urban area might be okay if I had tons of money, but I wouldn't want to be there struggling with my finances.
Lee
I Grew up in the East of France (Alps), then moved to French polynesia (Tahiti, yeah not really the same climate!), then back to France but in theNorth East. I love where I am, as long as my husband is with me ;) Home is where the heart is, no?
ReplyDeleteE is for Embroirery
Frederique, if we can find contentment wherever we are then we are far better off. I'm content with my circumstances, but I still have preferences and dreams--I just don't let them get in my way of enjoying the life I've been blessed with.
DeleteLee
After living in Chicago most of my life, I took a job in Atlanta (when I probably should have just gone to work elsewhere) and we moved South. At first I had the "grass is always greener" thing going on, but when we got settled we learned to like it here, and I can't imagine moving back to Chicago.
ReplyDeleteI did a lot of travel and saw a lot of places, and I think if I were to move anywhere else, it'd be to one of the states right down the middle of the country: North and South Dakota, Nebraska, Kansas, Oklahoma and Texas. Don't ask me why, I couldn't tell you.
I am happy where I live despite there being issues with neighbours and the home but I accept this. My hubby on the other hand, is not happy with the area and bitches...um...complains about the neighbours daily. He has no idea how to let things go. I would love to love in Europe with a small town oe somewhere in the mountains. Maybe this will happen one day
ReplyDeleteGrew up in farmland and then moved around the world. Now we are in California. But we still go back in summer to visit family. Would we move back to Illinois? Yes, for a month at a time, and never in summer.
ReplyDeleteOnce we found Northern Colorado, we knew we were home. I would like a chance to visit the ocean again, preferably from Florida, but just for a vacation. But if that's not to be, Colorado is my spot and I'll be happy here.
ReplyDeleteI have lived in and around Newie my whole life, can't imagine living anywhere else
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