tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post1853321333413196553..comments2024-03-28T22:21:46.973-07:00Comments on Tossing It Out: Do You Prefer Anger?Arlee Birdhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comBlogger76125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-50268238459860830222015-05-31T15:17:58.433-07:002015-05-31T15:17:58.433-07:00Birgit, I'd be curious to meet this person fac...Birgit, I'd be curious to meet this person face to face to see what kind of response I would get in that setting. Sometimes I think people acquire very different personas when they are behind the keyboard, but how can we really know in most cases.<br /><br />I'm feeling much better and the great responses I've received from my posts this week have helped.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-33926062317376683932015-05-31T13:43:13.470-07:002015-05-31T13:43:13.470-07:00I thought I posted here:) I must have dreamt it. C...I thought I posted here:) I must have dreamt it. Can you imagine how this person is if one actually met him/her? They are negative people and we don't need that in our lives. If one is constructive in criticism about a boom one wrote then that is different but to openly be mean is not even worthy of any comment. In the end not worth your time or effort. I hope you are feeling a little betterBirgithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09439720285857050428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-88841455765868938952015-05-30T22:09:54.253-07:002015-05-30T22:09:54.253-07:00Brandy, thank you for saying so. I do get angry, ...Brandy, thank you for saying so. I do get angry, but I think I've learned to control that anger and channel it into more constructive things. I've found that anger is usually countered with more anger which often leads to damage that can't be repaired easily.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-198353511820482382015-05-30T19:59:43.711-07:002015-05-30T19:59:43.711-07:00I really don't understand angry people. Anger ...I really don't understand angry people. Anger never makes anyone feel better. I think attacks via social media are often the worst kind. It's too easy to be "anonymous" and unaccountable. I've spent a long time ridding my life of negative people. When I come across them now I very rarely engage. I have better things to do! Kudos to you for trying to reach out to this angry person. You are clearly the bigger person. <br /><a href="http://brandysbustlings.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">Brandy from Brandy's Bustlings</a>~Brandy~https://www.blogger.com/profile/11315120700855490723noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-29045834843869435332015-05-29T08:43:23.730-07:002015-05-29T08:43:23.730-07:00Susan, I think if we are angry we need to look wit...Susan, I think if we are angry we need to look within ourselves rather than place blame for our anger elsewhere. We are responsible for ourselves and not other adults. <br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-82703051668211538002015-05-29T00:38:51.345-07:002015-05-29T00:38:51.345-07:00Hi Lee, amazing post and comments. There's su...Hi Lee, amazing post and comments. There's such a lot of anger in the world and too many misdirect their anger instead of truly looking for its source and take it out on others, not knowing how else to deal with it. i don't know what to say really other that life is too short to worry about others' anger ...Susan Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12041548718544123557noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-71044196844928730092015-05-28T18:45:59.501-07:002015-05-28T18:45:59.501-07:00I should have gotten the message when I was younge...I should have gotten the message when I was younger too. I did some stupid things because I thought I knew it all and didn't want to listen to others who knew better.<br /><br />Oh well, the lessons of life are often thought to be meant for someone else until we realized we missed the company memo that was giving us a promotion opportunity.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-73220460929180129822015-05-28T17:06:17.316-07:002015-05-28T17:06:17.316-07:00You see it with driving, too-everybody is Rambo wh...You see it with driving, too-everybody is Rambo when they are in their car, but when they park, they transform into Hello Kitty.<br /><br />The people who figure out most things are not worth getting bent out of shape over at a young age are the truly wealthy in this world. <br /><br />It took me far too long to get that message.<br /><br />But I agree with the Beer guys-if someone is giving you grief for simple reaching out, they have the problem.DiscConnectedhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07013919800637508392noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-50057137356048158672015-05-27T23:05:20.673-07:002015-05-27T23:05:20.673-07:00Michele, it is sad to see people get irrationally ...Michele, it is sad to see people get irrationally angry and sadder still to see those who are almost always angry. Negativity can be very contagious and is not much fun.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-3316368786045171512015-05-27T23:03:31.508-07:002015-05-27T23:03:31.508-07:00Elizabeth, we can always hope. I don't think ...Elizabeth, we can always hope. I don't think I'd want to deal with the general public. When I was in the wholesale business the clientele was usually pretty reasonable to work with, but we did have a few who could become extremely problematic. They were typically the smaller businesses that never amounted to much. The bigger guys were usually pretty cool.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-72962673665583733282015-05-27T23:00:26.385-07:002015-05-27T23:00:26.385-07:00Gary, good to have you as a friend. I too try to ...Gary, good to have you as a friend. I too try to be civil and appeal to reason when dealing with unruly behavior. Usually the conversation ends because I don't think they want to be reasonable.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-20664198160867650872015-05-27T21:03:05.003-07:002015-05-27T21:03:05.003-07:00Life is too short to be angry. Sometimes it's ...Life is too short to be angry. Sometimes it's just a matter of having the ability to cope with life stressors. They say that anger is depression turned outward. I feel sorry for angry people. They can't have much peace of mind. I used to be a reactive person, engaging in kind, but not anymore. I just let people be who they are and pick and choose who I hang with. <br />So sorry that the blogger disappointed you. It's a disappointment in humanity when one encounters such an angry person, especially when unprovoked. <br />Stick with the happy folks ! We be more fun anyway... :)<br />Michele at <a href="http://angelsbark.wordpress.com/" rel="nofollow">Angels Bark</a>Michele at Angels Bark https://www.blogger.com/profile/15891713963440451090noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-45185387512370657562015-05-27T20:38:26.739-07:002015-05-27T20:38:26.739-07:00People can get set off by the smallest of things, ...People can get set off by the smallest of things, and like you said, I think it is due to impatience, selfishness, and unwillingness to listen. Working in a pharmacy, I see this nasty side of people far too often. I know some of those people are really sick, but sadly, they are the ones that are usually more understanding. It's the regulars that give us the most grief. There have been times that people have blown up about a couple dollars price increase (which we have no control over), and even one man who started yelling at the cashier over 5 cents. Angry people are hard to comprehend and I don't think it reflects well on their character. I think it is much better to keep things on the positive side, especially if you are trying to market yourself. If people are negative toward me, I just try to let it go, but sometimes I overthink it and allow it to bother me. I have found, though, that letting go is the best form of relief and it can also help prevent me from becoming an angry person as well. On a positive note, there have been a few patients who have actually apologized for irrational behavior, so there is still hope out there even amongst the angry people.Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15165210377903518274noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-3881534189470869332015-05-27T20:07:59.710-07:002015-05-27T20:07:59.710-07:00Hi Lee,
Most assuredly, a thought-provoking post ...Hi Lee,<br /><br />Most assuredly, a thought-provoking post by your good self. I shall keep my comment rather brief. <br /><br />Although I'm sort of known for my tongue-in-cheek, somewhat cynical, somewhat satirical banter, I most certainly never go to the point of angry, personal exchanges. I believe that an exercise in futility.<br /><br />I have had folks leave some very rude, personal comments on my site. I do not react in such a way that just makes the situation worse. I usually reply in a polite, charming way that probably confuses them and diffuses them.<br /><br />Strangely enough, there are a few bloggers who I've been very supportive to who have thanked me by unfriending me on Facebook and unfollowing my site. Most bizarre but what the heck.<br /><br />Anyway, I'm you're buddy!<br /><br />Thanks, Lee.<br /><br />Gary klahaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08613505424843475639noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-57304121122949531442015-05-27T19:03:11.627-07:002015-05-27T19:03:11.627-07:00GB, if every unfriending had to be accompanied by ...GB, if every unfriending had to be accompanied by an explanation it might satisfy a lot of our curiosity about things. There's no accounting for some peoples' actions and even if we were told it still might not make any sense. Sometimes people can get just plain weird about things and maybe it's best when we become disassociated from those people. Now if they start spreading dirt that becomes an entirely different matter. I've had that happen to me and ended up having to do some damage control, but in the end I don't think it mattered that much since the blogs where it happened didn't have much in the way of readership anyway.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-55014476915797392232015-05-27T18:28:56.660-07:002015-05-27T18:28:56.660-07:00In the 8 years spent blogging, never have I attack...In the 8 years spent blogging, never have I attacked a fellow blogger directly. If a blogger upset with me for some unknown reason decides to get nasty (i.e. deleting comments from the moderation queue or rejecting comments that I made or basically ignoring me by not releasing my comments from the queue), I will vent indirectly about them in a post. I don't mention them personally by name, but I do what is SOP at work when I need to criticize a fellow employee about a payroll issue but don't want to single them out for personal attention: I send a general e-mail highlighting the issue and asking for everyone's cooperation in fixing it.<br /><br />Only with blogging, it's simply a general purpose vent/rant that doesn't actually name a particular blogger, only indirectly refers to them anonymously.<br /><br />Then I unfollow/unsubscribe their blog and move on with my life.<br /><br />As for acting nasty when you're trying to market a product, that's just simply self-inflicted stupidity masquerading a very public offing of one's self.<br /><br />Personally, I've lost about a half dozen FB friend for the simple reason of me being me. Since 99% of the time I'm unable to contact the person to ask why (including a writer who allowed me to use a blurb for re-release of my commercial debut, and another who raved about my book, but followed her husband's led when he unfriended me), that is the best reason I can come up with for losing friends on Facebook and for people who choose to act like toddlers on their blogs.G. B. Millerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09783331838434598963noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-24160940495219486362015-05-27T17:47:24.152-07:002015-05-27T17:47:24.152-07:00I think you expressed this well, Chris. Not knowi...I think you expressed this well, Chris. Not knowing that much about the blogger I guess he has some kind of issues from what others have said. I'm done with him unless he wants to communicate, but now I'd be wary of motives.<br /><br />I feel much better today. Got a decent sleep last night and getting this post off my mind helped a lot especially from the standpoint of the encouraging comments I've received so far.<br /><br />Thanks for yours.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-1975948263601033642015-05-27T17:21:51.842-07:002015-05-27T17:21:51.842-07:00I have had a similar experience to the one lyndagr...I have had a similar experience to the one lyndagrace related. You want to fit in, to be one of the cool kids. Then you say something, it gets misinterpreted, and suddenly you are dirt. A misunderstanding, to be sure, but the other person gets so bent on it the cyber-friendship is never the same. So you compromise, agree on things you might not fully agree on to keep the piece- and in the end, they take out whatever resentment the original comment sparked in them on you anyway. At least, that was the shade of it that happened to me. LG was probably just as well off to not make the effort.<br /><br />Now, the story you told, the first thing that went through my mind was, "Wow, a troll with a blog." Maybe they aren't a troll, but it sounds like the mindset of one. And it brings you to one conclusion- some times, you aren't meant to be with a particular group of "cool kids". God knows, I remember that well enough from high school. But, you know what? Years later I had contact with some of those "cool kids", and they were the same jerks they were in high school. If that's what it takes to be cool, you can have it. And I think the same thing applies to your blogger, my blogger, and lyndagrace's blogger. You wanna be a jerk, go ahead. Life has better things in store for me.<br /><br />Hope that you feel better about things soon. Hanging on to such frustrations ain't good for you. CWMartinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06798867734074134647noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-20662497738495694092015-05-27T15:43:00.899-07:002015-05-27T15:43:00.899-07:00You're right, Quanie. I've said a few thi...You're right, Quanie. I've said a few things in comments that I wish I hadn't. Not that they were negative things about bloggers, but they were just things I don't like the idea of them showing up in searches. I'm nice to bloggers but I don't mind defending myself with tact and reason if necessary. I try to be a professional as I can and that is something that becomes truer as time goes on. <br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-86970958880376882802015-05-27T15:29:08.689-07:002015-05-27T15:29:08.689-07:00Goodness! Thankfully, I've never experienced a...Goodness! Thankfully, I've never experienced a blogger beef (knock on wood) and I hope that I never do. I'd rather just walk away and keep my dignity intact. Stuff on the internet lives forever. And what you think you've deleted, people will screenshot. It's never worth it. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06317095707905133969noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-88242109482382026502015-05-27T14:41:55.982-07:002015-05-27T14:41:55.982-07:00Susan, very true! Anger like any other feeling is...Susan, very true! Anger like any other feeling is a matter of choice. Unfortunately most people are often ruled by emotions and that's when the irrationality steps in to take control. Communicating on line is almost like imaginary interaction so people are often more likely to say any old thing without thinking too much about it.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-57752890217153808882015-05-27T14:38:20.138-07:002015-05-27T14:38:20.138-07:00Barbara, you deal with things just as I do. I ten...Barbara, you deal with things just as I do. I tend to avoid the angry ugly blogs, but now and then I do happen upon them.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-35638801809348709172015-05-27T14:37:12.253-07:002015-05-27T14:37:12.253-07:00I think the 'distance' of social media giv...I think the 'distance' of social media gives some people license to be mean or rude in situations they would never be if speaking in person to another. It's a good place for cowards to act like bullies.<br />When I taught health to high school students, I tried to teach them to understand that no one can 'make' you angry. Anger is a choice. We can always chose not to react with anger.Susan Gourley/Kelleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02669793865290876168noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-90962272071394919282015-05-27T14:26:21.896-07:002015-05-27T14:26:21.896-07:00If a blogger was going for a Howard Stern type ima...If a blogger was going for a Howard Stern type image, being mean or angry sounding might be beneficial. I know some people who pick and tease in a manner that sounds angry or even contains curse words. I myself have always tried not to respond to a blog post or a comment with anger. I really don't think I ever have. I do on occasion find a post sickening or disturbing from a Christian perspective. Half the time I leave without commenting. Half the time I leave a respectfully worded comment expressing why I can't agree with them. The only time I express anger is in person, most often in response to someone being angry at me and sometimes due to someone repetitively ignoring me, disrespecting me or what I do or my position. The old "straw that broke the camel's back" thing. And then I absolutely boil over and let them have it with both barrels. (How's that for a mixed metaphor?) Barbara In Caneyheadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06053601327400989802noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-149224757183756660.post-29882206709343926262015-05-27T13:32:08.459-07:002015-05-27T13:32:08.459-07:00That's a gem, Jeffrey. A good example of how ...That's a gem, Jeffrey. A good example of how these types of things can be misconstrued.<br /><br />Lee<br />Arlee Birdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11663942782929929334noreply@blogger.com